Bipolar Bliss n' Blues

This is my personal fufillment/journal diary blog. I am bi-polar and sometimes its a little hard to sort out all that craziness, the feelings, the rush of emotions. This is my sanctuary. Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose. Lets see if I grow up to BE someone! Or... fade into the background like a wilted orchid. Once beautiful, now overshadowed by others in vibrance and ambition. Like minded souls, let us share in each others wisdom, celebrate life's victories, and support each other whenever we stumble.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

BIPOLAR health Care- Fight for the Right to have control over YOUR LIFE!

In my quest for more Stevie Nicks and Lindsey Buckingham info, I randomly stumbled upon  this blog:
IT'S JUST A RIDE. It's the touching, candid and oddly informative blog of a bipolar gentleman from the UK. His latest post was about the upcoming election and how the government wants to increase the number of "Talk therapists" for people with depression by cutting the Mental Health budget 5%. So.. let me get this straight.. The UK wants to CUT around 5% of the MH budget so they can pay for therapists to occupy/run/facillitate all the new depression intensive talk therapy centers they are planning to build...
    Hmm... I guess the UK is just as fucked up as we are.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Crazy Heart: Just a country boy... livin' in a country world..!

I finally got to see Crazy Heart. By now, my expectations were very high for this movie and I was not disappointed.

It moved me in ways that were so subtle, my emotions kind of creeped up on me. There were elements that were heart breaking, tension filled, romantic, realistic and surreal. The acting was superb. Jeff Bridges settled into his roll like it was a worn out, comfortable old couch he has sat on for years. Its like Jeff Bridges IS "The Dude," in real life, and this is what would have happened to him if he had decided to go a different route in life. I think Jeff Bridges was excellent in the moments of "non-acting": holding a glance just a little too long, or standing at the door contemplating his next move; even the way he holds his guitar and lovingly picks at it in a drunken stupor... He never breaks character.

Jeff is Bad Blake, the alchohalic, former country superstar, through and through. soundtrack is chock-full of these examples, none more touching to the soul, then the Title theme, "The Weary Kind." I found myself tearing up upon hearing it sung, first by Jeff Bridges (Bad Blake), and finally, by Colin Farrel (Tommy Sweet).

Friday, April 2, 2010

I Feel Myself Slipping Away

Bipolar Disconnect. Is it Happening to Me again?

Potential Emotional Trigger Culprits (since January)

  • Overwhelmed w/ school work

  • problems w/ VHAP unable to continue therapy and medication

  • My beloved Tante Cecile died of cancer less than a month after they found the brain tumor

  • missed a lot of class and for that reason alone,will not pass this semester

  • unemployed (still)

  • can't get organized enough to keep track of resumes, cover letters, mailings, emails

  • fair hearing trial for continuing healthcare

  • boy trouble/relationships/status/multiple suitor stuff