Bipolar Bliss n' Blues

This is my personal fufillment/journal diary blog. I am bi-polar and sometimes its a little hard to sort out all that craziness, the feelings, the rush of emotions. This is my sanctuary. Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose. Lets see if I grow up to BE someone! Or... fade into the background like a wilted orchid. Once beautiful, now overshadowed by others in vibrance and ambition. Like minded souls, let us share in each others wisdom, celebrate life's victories, and support each other whenever we stumble.

Saturday, June 14, 2014

What the Heck is in Asdrubal Cabrera's back pocket?

Does Anyone Know?

To me, I think it looks like the guy has his wallet stuffed in there while he's up at bat. Next time he's at the plate, watch him and wonder why you never noticed this unusually large and curiously shaped backside that's been standing right in front of you. He has a bulky rectangular thing going on that is not flattering any way you look at it. And you can't not look at it. Try to watch him and not notice his giant, funny shaped ass. Watch him like you've always watched him.

You can't right? Because that ASS sticks right out and now that's all you notice when he's swinging the bat. Or running around on the field.
There's no way he doesn't have anything in his back pockets... so the question becomes, WHAT is in there?

After some thought and some brief, but thoroughly entertaining conversations I've had on the subject, these are the likely candidates:

He's got Snuff in there. Folded up in a package. Pocket sized.
He's got a pack of bubblegum in there.
Sunflower Seeds.
Maybe it's his batting gloves folded nicely vs. shoved in and messy, the way most guys pocket their gloves. With the fingers sticking out so we know that that lump in your pocket is in fact your gloves and nothing more.

But Asdrubal keeps me guessing.
I like my theory it's his wallet. Maybe he's been mugged a lot, or had it stolen from the clubhouse. Maybe he doesn't trust people with his valuables. Maybe he's OCD or super-paranoid. It's fun to speculate.

I was curious if anyone else noticed this anomaly/baseball distraction besides me and my boyfriend (after I pointed it out to him).
If you google "Asdrubal Cabrera's butt", you get inane fan-girl messages like, "OMG he's got a hot butt!" And something about the Cleveland Indians needing to trade his butt, or wanting to trade his butt. BUT there is nothing about his strangely shaped backside. Has no one else noticed this giant caboose? Every time he's up at bat it's staring me right in the face. We'll blog about beards but not about butts?

Asdrubal, if you ever see this, please indulge me. What's going on back there? Is there something in your pocket or do you just have a big badonk-a-donk? For all the people out there with well-endowed asses, I am not hating on you. I have nothing against large rear ends. I think they are beautiful. So....

Asdrubal, if this is all natural and there's nothing going on back there, I think you're awesome.
Play well and play hard to make sure we remember you for your stats and not for your ass.
Because no one in baseball history wants to be know as the player with biggest, weirdest ass.

Much love,
La La

Thursday, June 5, 2014

I Believe in Second Chances

I've been given numerous second chances in my life. Second, third, fourth, and fifth chances. Chances I didn't deserve but ultimately am grateful for. I am an advocate for second chances especially when it comes to young, ignorant people who do bad things because they don't know a life outside of that. I was a bad kid. I was a father's worst nightmare when I was a teenager. I talked back, I skipped school, I smoked cigarettes and pot, I had older boyfriends that my parents never met, I stole, I drank, I snuck out of the house, I stole the car to get into bars downtown when I was underage... You get the idea. I was out of control and made a lot of mistakes and bad choices. My parents weren't perfect. Our family had a lot of problems and maybe if my Mom didn't have a head injury she suffered from being in a horrible car accident when I was little, my life would have been different. My upbringing suffered because of mental and emotional instability.

I didn't grow up in a broken home surrounded by crime and criminals so I have no idea how hard things can really be when you're a kid. I thought my life was hard but then I hear stories about kids who have been sexually abused, abandoned by drug-addicted parents who didn't want them anyway, kids who've been through every kind of foster parent you can imagine. Kids that grew up with their father, their uncle or their older brother in a gang, and they were expected to join themselves once they were old enough. Kids that didn't know any better and didn't know of a life outside of violence, desperation and hopelessness. Kids that were so poor they were starving. It's not surprising that the path to their future leads to jail.

People can be rehabilitated. I have seen it. You cannot change someone if they don't want to change, but if they want to change, you should support that right? A huge problem that's not getting enough attention is what happens to these kids, these juvenile delinquents, once they've served their time?
How do they get a job and start over?
A lot of businesses won't hire you if you have a DUI on your record, so there is an even smaller percentage that will hire you if you've got anything worse than that in your past. It doesn't matter that you found Jesus, or you were a model prisoner, you might as well be the guy who always got solitary confinement for stabbing people with sharp objects. Employers don't look at that, they don't compare. Prisoners are prisoners and they don't want you working for them.
They don't believe in second chances.

But some businesses do. This company, Homeboy Industries, hires ex-cons to make their bread. No, it's not the most glamorous job, but ANY job is a good job when you are a former prisoner. It's good to work with an employer that takes the time to try to understand you and where you came from. They don't judge you for what has happened in the past, they help you move forward. They believe in your potential and your commitment to change. Why don't more employers try to be like Homeboy industries? Why is there so much stigma when it comes to hiring an ex-con who has served his time and wants to change? Can we really decide someone is not right for the job when we are basing all of our opinions on who they were ten years ago?

If we don't give them a chance, they won't be able to change, no matter how much they want to. Many ex-criminals fall back into the lifestyle they left before they they were incarcerated. I think many of them are left without many options. What do you do when you've been locked away from the world for a decade, and are released to a society that won't accept you now? What do you do when you can't get a job. How do you provide for yourself?

Lets support companies like Homeboy Industries and their mission to help rehabilitate people that need a second chance. Homeboy Industries isn't just an employer. They offer services like tattoo removals for former gang members, case management, mental health, substance abuse, and domestic violence counseling. They have a Homegirl Cafe and A Homeboy Farmer's Market. They are saving people's lives because they care about the people that society has written off. Homeboy Industries is located in Los Angeles, but you can support them via donations if you don't live near them.
Visit to find out more. Every little bit helps. If you can't donate, please help raise awareness for this cause via social media. Like them on Facebook. Help get the word out!

Everyone deserves a second chance.

If YOU know of a great rehabilitation program near you, or you've read about one, please share with me via a comment, and I will be happy to add info to this blog.

Thursday, April 17, 2014

Wow I cannot believe it's been Three Years... I really need to get a new phone.

Hello Blog-o-verse,

This is an open letter to tell you that I am back. Where was I? You might say I was lost in thought for three years. Stuck in neutral and occasionally flooring the engine or letting it die all together. While I was gone, I had a lot of time to put things in perspective. Yes, there is still plenty of time to do something great. I sometimes felt like I was running out of time, and I was getting older and losing touch with the common man. In some ways I was OK with that. It's pop-culture that's not OK with it. Everything we buy needs to be replaced by year 3 or its probably "outdated." Especially technology. My laptop is 5 years old. It overheats, has a mediocre webcam, and weighs 14 lbs. I can't take it with me wherever I go. I wish I could but it's just not practical to carry it around. I do not own a tablet of any kind. I don't really see the point of having one. If I did buy one I would probably get the Windows Surface because it's both a notebook and a tablet. I must have my keyboard. I do not want to become one of those people who are ALWAYS on their phone but apparently I need to get with the times and buy a new one. Yes, I know: Phones are Cool. They can do pretty much everything except go to the bathroom for you. Oh Wait. They have a new one coming out. They call it the IPoop. It will probably be here in time for Christmas.

All kidding aside, what is it that makes doing everything on your phone cool? The portability factor can't be beat. You can take your phone with you just about anywhere. You can take a selfie in an airplane bathroom with poor lighting, turn yourself into a cat and post it on facebook. You probably shouldn't because of federal regulations during flight time as well as WHY would you want to.. but you CAN. Sadly, you can't stuff it in your back-pocket because awesome phones aren't pocket sized. If you have cargo shorts/pants then your good but watch out for pickpockets and don't hang upside down. Cargo pants are great but they don't protect your phone and phones are SO fragile now its ridiculous. I am actually scared to get a really nice one because I'm pretty sure I will break it. Like within a week. Phone insurance is not an option for me, it is a must. Remember flip phones?
I can't tell you how many times one of those little suckers would fall out of my pocket or off a high shelf (or even not-so-high shelves) and break in two.

One piece for hearing, doesn't work. The other piece for viewing and dialing,  might work but you can't hear anything. Pretty useless. One time my old
flip phone slid out of my pocket while I was getting into the car, and I ran over it. Another time I accidentally washed it. I heard it banging around in the dryer after looking for it for a half hour. Surprisingly it worked after a couple of days, though it was never quite the same. I'm bad with phones. I finally got phone insurance after replacing the third flip phone.

Now we have to worry about the screens.They get cracked, they get scratched, they get really dirty and you have to use special micro-fiber cloths to clean them with. To protect your phone, you need to get a case for it. The case will generally make your cool phone bulkier and heavier. But you can get one with Hello Kitty all over it. You can get one that turns your phone INTO Hello Kitty.
That's great for Hello Kitty fans and people who actually care what their phone looks like, but I don't care about all that. I was okay with my LG 900G blackberry wanna-be. It's a STUPID smart phone and it's so not cool. When I first got it, oh a couple of years ago, I thought it was pretty great. I loved that I could make my own ring tones and record videos and take decent pictures. I loved that it weighed hardly anything and I could fit it in my back-pocket like a calculator. I loved that it HAD a calculator. It was pre-android (if you can think back that far) so any apps I got were simple apps. But I never had apps before. I loved this phone... but now I hate it because now it's outdated and I can't stream You-Tube on my phone.We are SO spoiled now with technology and its almost too much for me to be able to handle, like which phone should I get to replace my crappy old one?
I'm leaning towards an IPhone or a Samsung Galaxy. I'm kind of anti- IPhone. A few years ago everyone I knew that had any money, or any of the guys I was dating had an IPhone. I started to become attracted to the guys who didn't have one because they were Rebels. I hesitated giving out my phone number to a potential suitor when he whipped out his IPhone. I'm not really sure what my problem was with the IPhone other than the fact there were a lot of assholes using them. The Galaxy started getting my attention. The advertising campaign for the Galaxy was pretty great. It was essentially, look at the cool stuff you can do with this phone.
 I thought this commercial was pretty cool. It seriously pauses when you look away. Really? How does it know that? Neato. That's pretty much what I got from that particular commercial.

I also like the unicorn one. How can anyone not love the Unicorn Apocalypse release-party idea? Did anyone think to look into making a Unicorn Apocalypse video game? Possibly for PS3 and PS4? I'd totally play that.
 This almost sold me but in order to get it I would have to switch to AT&T. Deal breaker.

BTW- where did this commercial come from?

 Is it from the same people who started making those cheesy Apple commercials? Remember Christmas time? Thank goodness we have our IPhone or our IPad so we can capture all these family moments. So sugary sweet they almost made me sick. The sad part is that besides me and my boyfriend, EVERYONE we knew ate that shit up. I knew the ads were just trying to pull at my heartstrings and failing miserably. Apple, if you want to touch people emotionally, check out this Budweiser commercial:

This commercial was perfection. Bonus points for the Passenger song.  If you don't at least tear up while watching this, you probably don't have a soul.

So what can I say... I guess commercials really do influence what I purchase. I know I'm drinking a Bud on occasion due to their emotional WIN. You keep making commercials like this Budweiser and I might need to buy an 18 pack once a month to support you. And I LOVE my micro-brews.
Samsung, if you make another Galaxy S ad and it has a Death Cab for Cutie song with a kitten in it, I might go to the store today and buy one. Until then, I am weighing my options reading 12,000 reviews on the Galaxy, IPhone, Nexus, Droid, Windows, and HTC phones, while my phone becomes more and more obsolete and I hate it like I hate the Yankees.

Go Sox.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Can't Sleep.. Lindsey Buckingham and Stevie Nicks will eat me...

"I was looking for info on Stevie Nicks and Lindsey Buckingham, and your site popped up with that ultra fabulous CD cover. I don't even really LIKE fleetwood mac (i found their songs annoying, dated, and forgettable) but thanks to my ex boyfriend, I am curious about their working and artistic relationship."

What ultra fabulous CD cover am I TALKING about? I know I've got tons of info printed out on these two. Like I stated, my ex got me curious. I think we are Stevie Nicks and Lindsey Buckingham in theory. Being on stage with ------ is like being in love with him all over again. IN LOVE not just I love him, I am IN LOVE with him- on stage. When we sing together, when we connect emotionally playing music, there is no greater feeling. This is the high of love and this is what Stevie and Lindsey battled through in all their years with Fleetwood Mac.Sometimes the greatest and most honest pieces of art come from the vast confusion from turmoil of the heart. Love's despair. An ultimate denial of getting the things in life that are most desired. From the pain, blooms beauty.

It took nearly 40 years to complete Nicks' song, "Moonlight (Vampire's Dream)". She wrote it about her and Lindsey. According to Stevie, the last verse was inspired by the Twilight series; New Moon in particular. I would gather that it also helped inspire the Title of the song.

The first and the third verse in 'Moonlight' were written in the mid-'70s. The second verse -- "She's lonely, lost, and disconnected" -- was written in Brisbane right after I saw the movie. So the song, really, is ancient times up to today.
"It's strange, she runs from the ones she can't keep up with" -- is all about the love affair between Bella and Edward [in 'New Moon']. But "Some call her strange lady from the mountains/Others say she's not really real," that's written in 1976. The same with the third verse: "He loves her, but he loves his life alone as well" -- people would think that was written about Edward, but it was written about Lindsey. So this really is an ancient song that encompasses my strange and everlasting relationship with Lindsey Buckingham, and Bella and Edward, all mixed into one.

There was something vampiric, then, between you and Lindsey?

It is! Our love affair. As much as we fight and have our differences of opinion on almost everything, if anything were to happen to either of us, I would be the first one there and he would be the first one here. So it is a story [about how] love never dies.

-- Stevie Nicks, April 2011 Interview

They were madly in love, then they broke up, then they couldn't stay away from each other, then he broke her heart, she broke his, they both dated others, fell in love over and over, stomped on each others hearts, stopped communicating, ran away, found each other, married (Lindsey) someone else, became friends and started playing again. Most recently, they worked together on, "In Dreams," the first solo album she has made in 10 years.

Stevie says she will ALWAYS love Lindsey. He was THE ONE to her.
Lindsey says when they are on stage together, they are in love with each other. At that emotionally charged, pivotal moment in music, they are soulmates.
Than Lindsey goes home to his wife and children and Stevie tours as a solo act. They go away to separate lives, even if Stevie says Lindsey probably was the love of her life.

Two people who love each other, can't stay away from each other, tried just friendship, fell in love again, hurt each other, broke the other's heart (mine), stopped communicating, found each other, started making music again... Our story. Our song.

Guess we aren't all that unique after all.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Plants- some brief thoughts.

I'm giving myself 4 minutes to type this because I have to get started on painting the wall in the bedroom of my new apartment. Megan and I just moved into an nice place on Chase Street. Beautiful little apartment with lots of light. The price was right, location pretty decent and my room is A LOT bigger than the tiny one I had on Rose Street. No closet, but I'm going to put up some shelves for excess clothing.

It would be nice to have some beautiful (and beneficial) house plants to complement the decor and environment of our "modern/classic-meets-bohemian" decor. I know I can only get away with so much as far as the free spirited,  anything-goes-vibe. I want to find a happy medium with my new roomie. Both she and I are really excited to be able to deck out our bachelorette pads however we want, since we weren't able to do that in our last homes. Now, its just Me and her. And our three cats: Pumpkin, Ozzie, and Rasco. And Harry, my snake plant I aquired from my good friend Joules when she moved to Colorado.

With the addition of Harry the Snake Plant, or (Sansevieria trifasciata ‘Laurentii’) , my air is cleaner because He eliminates CO2 from the air at night. Most plants do the opposite by putting CO2 in the air at night, oxygen in the air during the day. So, thanks to Harry, my air that we are all breathing is a little bit cleaner:)

(Harry in all his glory!)

Areca Palms,

commonly known as "Butterfly Palms," are extremely popular as ornamental plants.  A small to medium sized palm tree like this will probably cost you around 100.00. Its worth it though as it will clear the CO2 out of the air during the day. I do worry that my cat, Ozzie, will have a field day chewing off those leaves... She did quite a number on my Basil, grazing on it like a cow until I had left were some VERY sad-looking stems stuck in a pot. I don't know if I want to spend 100.00 on a plant my cat will likely destroy, leaf by leaf...


also known as Devils Ivy, Golden Pothos or Money Plant, removes chemicals from the air. It is good to have in the house, or around your windows/trellis, anywhere it can climb and flourish. IT IS CONSIDERED TOXIC TO PETS. The ASPCA warns pet owners not to have this plant in any location where your animal can get to it. The leaves are toxic and will make your pet sick. Its also not good for babies, small children to consume as it will affect them in a similar fashion.
I plan on getting one and hanging it outside our kitchen windows. I want to see that little sucker TAKE OVER our porch area. It would be like the secret garden eventually, if we let it creep all over the place.

A Site that could be useful in deciding what plants are going to live at chez Chase Street:

PLANTS THAT ARE TOXIC TO ANIMALS  A listing of many houseplants that are toxic to animals. It is run by the Prince George Veterinary Hospital. It is not a complete listing, but it is fairly extensive AND it has pictures of the plants in question. 

All of this comes from an email I got about the site: ALL MY FAVES
from there, I visited site of the week:  BROKEN SECRETS - a  Webby Award winning site about interesting things you didn't know- yet. Cool Site. I could spend a lot of time blogging on the stuff I learned there... oh, wait.. I just did. Crap... 1 hour to be precise. 

...And I thought I was only going to spend 4 mins on this.