Wow I cannot believe it's been Three Years... I really need to get a new phone.

Hello Blog-o-verse,

This is an open letter to tell you that I am back. Where was I? You might say I was lost in thought for three years. Stuck in neutral and occasionally flooring the engine or letting it die all together. While I was gone, I had a lot of time to put things in perspective. Yes, there is still plenty of time to do something great. I sometimes felt like I was running out of time, and I was getting older and losing touch with the common man. In some ways I was OK with that. It's pop-culture that's not OK with it. Everything we buy needs to be replaced by year 3 or its probably "outdated." Especially technology. My laptop is 5 years old. It overheats, has a mediocre webcam, and weighs 14 lbs. I can't take it with me wherever I go. I wish I could but it's just not practical to carry it around. I do not own a tablet of any kind. I don't really see the point of having one. If I did buy one I would probably get the Windows Surface because it's both a notebook and a tablet. I must have my keyboard. I do not want to become one of those people who are ALWAYS on their phone but apparently I need to get with the times and buy a new one. Yes, I know: Phones are Cool. They can do pretty much everything except go to the bathroom for you. Oh Wait. They have a new one coming out. They call it the IPoop. It will probably be here in time for Christmas.

All kidding aside, what is it that makes doing everything on your phone cool? The portability factor can't be beat. You can take your phone with you just about anywhere. You can take a selfie in an airplane bathroom with poor lighting, turn yourself into a cat and post it on facebook. You probably shouldn't because of federal regulations during flight time as well as WHY would you want to.. but you CAN. Sadly, you can't stuff it in your back-pocket because awesome phones aren't pocket sized. If you have cargo shorts/pants then your good but watch out for pickpockets and don't hang upside down. Cargo pants are great but they don't protect your phone and phones are SO fragile now its ridiculous. I am actually scared to get a really nice one because I'm pretty sure I will break it. Like within a week. Phone insurance is not an option for me, it is a must. Remember flip phones?
I can't tell you how many times one of those little suckers would fall out of my pocket or off a high shelf (or even not-so-high shelves) and break in two.












One piece for hearing, doesn't work. The other piece for viewing and dialing,  might work but you can't hear anything. Pretty useless. One time my old
flip phone slid out of my pocket while I was getting into the car, and I ran over it. Another time I accidentally washed it. I heard it banging around in the dryer after looking for it for a half hour. Surprisingly it worked after a couple of days, though it was never quite the same. I'm bad with phones. I finally got phone insurance after replacing the third flip phone.

Now we have to worry about the screens.They get cracked, they get scratched, they get really dirty and you have to use special micro-fiber cloths to clean them with. To protect your phone, you need to get a case for it. The case will generally make your cool phone bulkier and heavier. But you can get one with Hello Kitty all over it. You can get one that turns your phone INTO Hello Kitty.
That's great for Hello Kitty fans and people who actually care what their phone looks like, but I don't care about all that. I was okay with my LG 900G blackberry wanna-be. It's a STUPID smart phone and it's so not cool. When I first got it, oh a couple of years ago, I thought it was pretty great. I loved that I could make my own ring tones and record videos and take decent pictures. I loved that it weighed hardly anything and I could fit it in my back-pocket like a calculator. I loved that it HAD a calculator. It was pre-android (if you can think back that far) so any apps I got were simple apps. But I never had apps before. I loved this phone... but now I hate it because now it's outdated and I can't stream You-Tube on my phone.We are SO spoiled now with technology and its almost too much for me to be able to handle, like which phone should I get to replace my crappy old one?
I'm leaning towards an IPhone or a Samsung Galaxy. I'm kind of anti- IPhone. A few years ago everyone I knew that had any money, or any of the guys I was dating had an IPhone. I started to become attracted to the guys who didn't have one because they were Rebels. I hesitated giving out my phone number to a potential suitor when he whipped out his IPhone. I'm not really sure what my problem was with the IPhone other than the fact there were a lot of assholes using them. The Galaxy started getting my attention. The advertising campaign for the Galaxy was pretty great. It was essentially, look at the cool stuff you can do with this phone.
 I thought this commercial was pretty cool. It seriously pauses when you look away. Really? How does it know that? Neato. That's pretty much what I got from that particular commercial.

I also like the unicorn one. How can anyone not love the Unicorn Apocalypse release-party idea? Did anyone think to look into making a Unicorn Apocalypse video game? Possibly for PS3 and PS4? I'd totally play that.

 
 This almost sold me but in order to get it I would have to switch to AT&T. Deal breaker.

BTW- where did this commercial come from?
                             

 Is it from the same people who started making those cheesy Apple commercials? Remember Christmas time? Thank goodness we have our IPhone or our IPad so we can capture all these family moments. So sugary sweet they almost made me sick. The sad part is that besides me and my boyfriend, EVERYONE we knew ate that shit up. I knew the ads were just trying to pull at my heartstrings and failing miserably. Apple, if you want to touch people emotionally, check out this Budweiser commercial:

This commercial was perfection. Bonus points for the Passenger song.  If you don't at least tear up while watching this, you probably don't have a soul.

So what can I say... I guess commercials really do influence what I purchase. I know I'm drinking a Bud on occasion due to their emotional WIN. You keep making commercials like this Budweiser and I might need to buy an 18 pack once a month to support you. And I LOVE my micro-brews.
Samsung, if you make another Galaxy S ad and it has a Death Cab for Cutie song with a kitten in it, I might go to the store today and buy one. Until then, I am weighing my options reading 12,000 reviews on the Galaxy, IPhone, Nexus, Droid, Windows, and HTC phones, while my phone becomes more and more obsolete and I hate it like I hate the Yankees.

Go Sox.